Monday, November 28, 2011
A word about adoption...
Okay friends- I normally would not even post this on my blog but I am to the end of my rope!!! Just a few thoughts on adoption- which we have done. I can't tell you how many times Jared and I have been out and about and total strangers come right up to me and ask"is he adopted??" or how did you get a boy?? Is he Chinese?? Well, friends the answer from now on to any of these or any other ridiculous questions will be "my child can understand every word that you are saying- please do not ask these questions- thank you". I have said that several times already. I just don't understand how folks can be so insensitive!!!!! Why would a perfect stranger walk right up to me and ask things like this when adoption is a very personal family decision. It can also be a traumatic experience for children when people ask questions such as these. We had been waiting to adopt for 3 years and in all of that time, I never once walked up to anyone and asked questions such as this. Even now, when I meet or see moms that may or may not have adopted, I do not approach them with silly questions!! I am sorry to ramble on about this but I just felt the need to vent from my frustration. I try not to be rude but obviously I am going to have to be to stop people from being rude to me and my child. If people say, he is so cute, etc. that's all that is needed to be said. Thanks for listening and have a great week!!
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3 comments:
People can be so thoughtless, and have no clue what they are saying. I am sorry they are so rude. Jared is adorable!
Just saw this, Debbie. Unfortunately, we all go through life dealing with the rude, thoughtless actions of others. No matter how many times we respond to their behavior, someone else will come along with their own inappropriate, ignorant questions or statements. Often, saying nothing is better than showing our anger. Jared might think that if you were angry at the person, the person must know something that is wrong.If he sees you ignore the situation, hopefully, he will ignore it also. At the most, perhaps you could respond by asking the person "why do you need to know that?" OR "Have a Blessed day." Then walk away. There is no magic answer to ignorance. Just pray for strength to endure and teach Jared every day that he is a very special person. You all are very special.Blessings for a wonderful CHRISTMAS!
Isn't that the truth Debbie!!! Let me tell you, we have had the same insensitive questions like where Elizabeth got her dark hair and stuff like that. There have been many times that I have thanked God for her hearing loss because most of the time she had no idea what was said! HA!! But I do like your response to those questions and it will teach Jared what to say when he is asked the same questions by his peers.
Miss you and Kathy and your shop! Matter of fact, I took Christmas down today and put up a new stitchery pillow that Kathy made that I bought at the fall open house. Now when I look at the things I bought that she made and that you made, I will have happy memories! Wishing you a blessed new year!
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